Ive just received government funding for a four-hour expedition to find your G-spot. My zipper., 5. Because I need help; I'm getting lost in your eyes. Want to come back to my place and do the Box-Cox transformation?, 53. I was feeling off today, but you definitely turned me on. You're sitting on the sofa in your pants, eating a slice of pizza and sipping on a cold one.One eye is on the TV and the other is on Tinder, as you swipe right for the 100th time that night.No matches in 24 hours damn that sucks.Then all of a sudden YOU HAVE A MATCH.As you sit up and wipe the pizza dust from your chest, you swipe to your messages and see the match.Kelly, 1 mile away.Sexy, VERY SEXY.Let's not screw this up.You being typing."Kelly, your face says innocent, but I need to tell you a secret that body is saying something completely different"SEND.Seconds later, you see those floating bouncing bubbles.She's replying!"Haha! My name is Romeo, would you be my Juliet? You're definitely on my to-do list tonight. If you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple. The following Cute Pick-Up Lines have been . I heard you like Magic, well bend over and watch my d*ck disappear., 1. Me 'n' u. Want to ride my broomstick?, 2. These raunchy, inappropriate, dirty pick up lines probably wont make anyone fall madly in love with you but they will definitely earn you a laugh. My Magikarp knows a little more than SPLASH if you know what I mean., 10. We hope, you will easily find your favorite Gamer Pick Up Lines from this list. I bet your nipples are pink. I want to fuck you so bad, but I know that I cant., 21. Have you seen one? 65. 170. Amen. Do you have rubbers at your house or should I pull out?, 36. 165. Im like a tropical island. Because I know some good karma-sutra positions. Would you prefer to fight 100 duck-sized horses or 1 horse-sized duck? Stop flirting with me Grace, we've only just met We're a match! We both bring the cuddles. Dont let this go to your head, but do you want some?, 52. If I pour chocolate all over my body, will you lick it up?, 38. I can only take so much flirting from a distance. Your tits are so beautiful I wont even pretend to know where your face is. Enter your email and I'll send you some PROVEN techniques, tips and sneaky tricks that's helping "average" men get laid regularly. Chapter 2 98. Here are 5 that could hold promise in reality and 5 that never would. Ill make like the repot man and smash your back doors in. Lets bypass all the bullshit and just get naked., 43. opening line on Tinder? Since weve been told to reduce waste these days, what you say we use these condoms in my pocket before they expire., 42. I named my dick the truth cause bitches cant handle it!, 23. Wanna be my first?, 25. Cause I saw you checking out my package., 3. I just want to stick it in your wooper., 6. Are you a cowgirl? On HIMYM, Neil Patrick Harris' Barney was famous for his pick-up lines. We use information collected through cookies and similar technologies to improve your experience on our site, analyse how you use it and for marketing purposes. 143. There's a reward for your capture up in heaven ya know. If you prefer to be a little funny and entertaining, you can try these sexy pick up lines for guys and girls. Because youve got some big, round, beautiful melons. In my lap., 27. Im peanut butter, and youre jelly. Be on it., 16. Are you a compact set? My next mission is exploring Uranus. [Uranus = your anus], 41. 3. 36. The triangle icon that indicates to play. Kiss me if I'm wrong but, [pause for a moment] isn't your name Alice? Save a broom; ride a Quidditch player., 14. so our main focus is on cute pickup lines, funny pick up lines, cheesy pick up lines, corny pickup lines, clever pickup lines, bad pick up lines, worst pick up lines, sweet pickup lines, and this list is . In some cases, data obtained from cookies is shared with third parties for analytics or marketing reasons. Sit on my face and Ill eat my way to your heart. Do you like cherries? Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you can jack it when we get back to my place., 41. Im like a Rubiks Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get. Because I can see myself in your pants., 46. Your audience. Would you mind giving me a hand?, 13. cuz I feel a level-up., 49. Are you an archaeologist? 45. Girl are you an iceberg? Lets have sex., 47. I couldve called heaven and asked for an angel, but I was hoping youre a slut instead!, 41. I bring pizza. Ive recently qualified as a gynecologist and Id like to offer you my pro-boner services. What are you doing tonight besides me?, 29. Lets get hammered first, and then Ill nail you., 43. Also, share these with your friends; who knows, you might do a fun bet or a social experiment with them. Excuse me, I am about to go masturbate and needed a name to go with the face. Do you have pet insurance? Using kinky pick up lines is just afunny(yetflirty) way to open up aconversation. Because youre making me want to go down. I just popped a Viagra. These funny pick up lines will show you have a great sense of humor. Would you like to try an Australian kiss? 57. 134. If you were oxygen, I would be an alkali metal so I could get in you and explode., 18. Did you hear about the fat Marley kid? 'Cause you've got FINE written all over you. 79. Luckily, I have a never-ending supply of cream for you., 2. Make these pick up lines written for the different common girls name work for you! Thank God I'm wearing gloves girl or you'd be too hot to handle DAYMN. I can give you a shot of protein when were finished. 11. I was going to say something really sweet about you. Can I watch?, 5. We should totally meet up for a pizza and f*ck. Just go up and introduce yourself. Catch up with your crush's inertia in motion. Youre going to have that body the rest of your life, and I just want it for one night., 12. Cause I had to slow down to take a second look at you. I lost my teddy bear can i sleep with you. #NoHobo. 161. 54. Go ahead. 52. Anyone with a good sense of humor will appreciate them. 63. They made a new color lightsaber called flesh wanna see?, 24. 185. Have you ever slept with a [use the color of your hair]? 7. That's why you downloaded Tinder and swipes right hundreds of times while sitting on the toilet.But guess what?You're most likely not going to bang the girls on there that you REALLY want on there.So you have two options:1) Settle for scraps2) Use the chat up lines from above to increase your chances of being noticed.Or there's a third optionYou can actually delete Tinder and get out of the house.Approach the first girl you see and speak to her. I suffer from amnesia. Coz, I don't understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out. On a scale of 1 to 10, you're a 9because I'm the 1 you need. Well be happy to credit a source. Mind if I take a look? After being gone for over four years. How about you use REST, so I can sleep with you., 17. If you were Kim Jung Un youd have no problem making me stand to attention. 140. Do you have a shovel? They seem to be stuck on you! Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again? What, you dont like pizza?. from the inside?, 35. What does a Marley order at Mcdonalds? Want to taste my dick? I wouldnt risk arrest for public indecency for just anyone. My little friend spits when hes happy. Feel free to join the ranks of 35 000 000 readers that already found our tips helpful. Can you do telekinesis? Dirty Pick Up Lines That Might Get You Into Trouble I'm not usually into hunting, but I'd love to catch you and mount you all over my house. F*ck me if Im wrong, but we have plans to have sex tonight., 18. Well, here I am. Did you hear about the fat Marley kid? Can you tell me what time your legs open, please? My dicks been feeling a little dead lately. You know what I like in a girl? Im a businessman. I heard you are looking for a stud. Hey baby, I must be in your eigenspace, because you make me grow., 43. 10. You sure know how to raise a cock ;). Shall we see if Im allergic to your juices? As the title says. 89. I wish I was an Abra, so I could TELEPORT to your bedroom., 31. Your body has the nicest arc length Ive ever seen., 11. "Hi, My Name Is [insert name]." I'd say this one is the number one pick-up line of all time. Wanna know what theyre saying? [Girl: No!] Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth? My Lickitung can reach deeper than you can imagine!, 32. I hope you don't mind cheesy pick-up lines because if you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple. Because youre the only HO I see., 48. You be Flourine and Ill be Francium and maybe later I can give you an electron., 24. If you place your tits on my face I bet I can guess how much they weight. I'm craving something sweet. My guitar teacher says my fingering is good, especially on the G-string., 31. Are you flappy bird? I might be a physics major, but Im no Bohr in bed., 11. I'll text you on WhatsApp, we can meet this week. We should totally meet up for a pizza and f*ck. Are you my appendix by any chance? I lay down, you blow, and well see how high you can make me., 34. That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning., 24. Want to find out what the best thing you can do with your lips is. 2) Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? Baby, you make me harder than the traveling salesman problem., 37. 167. [He: No.] pick-up line A sentence, phrase, or question used to start a flirtatious conversation with a potential romantic or sexual partner. Or is it just you? I'm new in town. I know a great way to burn off the calories in that drink. Can you start printing out some missing person posters? I want to fuck you so bad, but I know that I cant., 8. Because youre making me hard. You need to read the last point again, just kidding. You make me NP-hard, but I have an algorithm for you to approach me., 30. Wanna help me out?, 18. Sex is a killer want to die happy?, 28. Dont worry about drinking your calories, Ill help you burn them off. Ive been banned from playing Tapped Out. Will you marry me for just one night?, 7. Scrambled or blown?, 50. Who says men don't ask for directions? You're always off to a good start if you can make them laugh. Now is your chance!, 33. 16. Shakira was wrong, Im definitely confusing. First, Id like to kiss you passionately on the lips; then, Ill move up to your belly button., 40. There are 7.8 billion smiles on earth, and I'm still waiting for yours. My house is called the Shrieking Shack for a reason. Feel my shirt. Id love to get a peek at your Rat-tatas!, 40. Do you like chocolate? Im the doctor of love baby, and youre overdue for your meat injection!, 27. I've seen you before you were at the spankathon downtown 2 weeks ago. Want to come over to my place and watch porn on my 32" flat screen mirror? Below, 16 smooth pickup lines the women of Reddit say won them over. Heck, if youre just browsing for some funny stuff to read you hit the jackpot as we had a fun time putting together these questions that you would ask someone you like out. Filipino pick up lines in 2023. 35. Ive got one thatd look great in your mouth. 31. Is your father a lumberjack [Girl: No, why?] Ill remember to protect my wand when entering your chamber of secrets!, 24. I know youre not holomorphic everywhere so why dont you let me find your singularities., 1. Because youre making me wet. Hey girl, is your name winter? "I'm not used to approaching strangers but your smile invited me to talk to you.". I'll put a tear drop in the ocean. Here they are, the ultimate list of Tinder pick up lines, that will get you ahead of the 90% of rejected men and help you actually get laid, instead of unmatched for the 10th time in one day! I don't want you falling for anyone else. Beautiful girls all over the world I could be chasin', but my time would be wasted 'cause they got nothin' on you. We dont have to tape it., 5. Youre so hot Id suck the farts out of your ass. Everyone is aware of whom they are hanging out with. All beautiful ladies deserve a pearl necklace and Im just the man to give you one. Because you looked a little thirsty when you were looking at me. Lets make like the pages of this guidebook and get under the covers., 28. If its true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning. You know why they call me the cat whisperer? Why dont we head to my bedroom, peel back my Star Wars sheets, and discover what a true Jedi can do with his light-saber?, 16. My fridge is full of your favorite breakfast food for when you wake up underneath me. Fucking unscrewing the wine, just screw me instead. First impressions and reactions to funny and vine videos makes it more interesting to some viewers as it shows my true and genuine reactions. No Woman, No Pie Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken wing? [He: No, why?] Sex is evil; Evil is sin; Sin is forgiven; so lets begin., 30. Are you my new boss? I hope you know CPR because you just took my breath away! 82. blargman327 Report 45 points Great tits. 141. My mouth is just aching for your tongue., 20. Baby you must be a modulus sign, cos whenever you wrap your arms around me I always feel positive!, 24. Take that for what you will. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. Ive heard a good orgasm is good for any kind of pain. Would you care to normalize it?, 36. How about we make sure were even with them? 56. Do you need a running partner? This website uses cookies to give you the best experience. Theyare usually only set in response to actions made by you which amount to a request for services, suchas setting your privacy preferences, logging in or filling in forms. So, what are the chances of my balls slappin your ass tonight?, 7. Theres an awful lot of moisture in here., 25. Tonight. Hey baby, can I see whats under your radical?, 25. Want to go back to my place?, 12. Here is a list of pick up lines for girls that might get her to notice you: Are you a parking ticket? They may be used to deliver video content on our website. Lets have a Tri-Wizard tournament: Protect your wand from Hogwarts when you enter the chamber of secrets., 9. 177. Do you peel a banana from the top or bottom? Some men go around telling women they have an eight-inch penis, but Id never shortchange myself like that. "What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? 14. Ill show you my tan lines if youll show me yours. 78. Your outfit is so dazzling. I hear the best cure for headaches is sex. 84. Dont stick out your tongue unless you intend to use it., 32. 42. You must be my coronary artery because you're wrapped around my heart. Are you a doctor? Stop being melancholic. Lets see how many four-letter nicknames I can come up with for you while you bounce up and down on me.