If that isnt bad enough, he dropped my right leg DURING labor, to show my doctor the outfit my daughter would be wearing home! Away." In hindsight, I love having pictures from the delivery room. Jackass. I wish men weren't so stupid about some things. -Anne, When the nurses asked how bad the pain was from 1-10 and I said 10, my husband said oh, come on it cant be that bad. Im sure there are a ton of great husbands/partners out there. When they called my room at 3 am to go nurse her, my husband declined to go with me because he was just so tired after everything that happened that day. Around 3am I felt a twinge. At 6am. My husband was working at the lake (20 min away) and was rushing home to change and come to the hospital. I woke up at 2 am when my water broke, shook my husband awake and told him. You all left 237(!) My lovely ex husband was irritated that I was deciding to have the child on overtime hours and he 7 min read. He said that it was probably nothing and I should try to get some sleep. I want to know how old the OP and her H are as well as the ages of some of the responders who are so sure their H's will slow down the boozehound behavior closer to their edds. The worst expectation you as a wife to an alcoholic husband may have is to expect a change overnight. You may come across situations where things go beyond your control, and you might end up in an embarrassing situation. , Thats awesome. Well, setting up limits for them. Out of all the natural ways to induce labor at home, nipple stimulation is one of the most reliable options. pinterest.com. I dont want to deal with your stink and neither do the doctors and nurses! I would talk to him on a day he doesn't work like people said, and maybe keep a taxi service on speed dial. He then moved to the toilet to puke some more before I yelled at him that hed better get the hell out of there because I needed it NOW. Also, per Davidson, never, ever wear open-toed shoes to the hospital. 1. As he was putting the needle in my back, my husband let out a loud snore and the dr laughed. Now I refuse to touch it so that I can pass it down to my own daughter. This behavior will shorten his lifespan, increase his odds of developing certain types of cancers, raise his weight, sap his energy, and generally make things miserable. (Dont even ask about our planning ability! Or do you let fly in situ? Because, he was a little bit tired. This happened a few times until I fit woke him up to tell him it was time to go to the hospital. Yeah. My water broke in the middle of the night, we made our way to the hospital and once we arrived i was put in a wheel chair, wheeled into the elevator and left unable to walk because of pain while my husband went to find a free parking spot. omg, i totally broke out in huge loud laughter when i read this.in a silent room at that. Little do they know. Woodward said the labor was moving fast and about 15 minutes later, the baby had arrived, even before paramedics had arrived on the scene. With this next one, were doing a home birth, so no monitors, but I still anticipate him being so busy talking that hes not really focused on me. Every nurse who came to check on me kept asking me if my husband was coming to be with me. She gives me her phone number . Joanish, My husband grew up on a cattle ranch, and during labor with our first he very confidently announced to the nurse that he wasnt nervous at all because Ive seen this a million times with cows. I asked him to rub my aching back and he refused. Mine said I was making a spectacle of myself while in an induced labor with back to back contractions. Many people who struggle with alcoholism are reluctant to accept treatment on their own. That he won't stop for a few weeks while you approach the end of your pregnancy (or forever) is even MORE indicative of that dependency and addiction. He said okay, proceded to go hook up the horse trailer, load his horses and tell me that he was going to a branding. Also I am not a screamer, and when the contractions were fierce like that, I would just lay on my side, tightly gripping the bed rail, sometimes whimpering quietly as I waited for it to pass. Most women will go into labor within 12 hours of their water breaking, but this can happen much sooner. My experience is pretty tame compared to most of these! A 'habit' of drinking more than 5 drinks in a night, thinking that he 'deserves' to unwind however he wants, these are signs that he dependent on alcohol. Jaime Clark didn't feel contractions with her first baby, either. I could barely walk for a week after the c section, my normal recovery time for that is two days. I told my husband in the morning that I had been in labor most of the night (he slept through it). an hour later, he arrived 15 minutes before our daughter did. I would definitely tell him if he's buzzed he is not welcome in the delivery room because it will only cause you more distress while you're trying to bring your first child into this world. I was panting when he turned and yelled at me why cant you get to four. The midwife explained it at the hospital as the baby was born less then 30 minutes later. I ended up wandering around the hospital and eventually bumped into him as he was on his way back in Second, how important is it to your husband that he be at the birth? So not only did my husband eat an Indian take-away while I was in the throws of labour, he told me my hair looked a mess. Only when you will make them realize that it is a problem and it puts you in an awkward position afterward, they might understand the intensity of the issue and will look for a solution. Have you ever discussed this with friends and inquired about how much their husbands drink? And that I hadnt eaten dinner and was starving. Copyright 2009-2023 Creative Skirt, LLC. I guess this is natures version of temporary amnesia because clearly, without it, wed never go back for more. When they were out (it was 2am after all), HE WAITED FOR THEM TO BREW A FRESH POT. My mom always tells the story of when she was in labor with my sister, on Thanksgiving Day, and somewhere around 20-so hours of labor my dad ate a full Thanksgiving dinner, turkey drumstick and all, right in front of her. We checked into the hospital at 7am, they started pitocin by 8am, and he only stepped out of the room twice (to smoke :boo:) until 8pm when E was born. He's in sales and always has social work meetings where drinks are served, too, which doesn't help. I gave birth in a Cambodian hospital that, well lets say was set up with top notch 1950s style equipment. I complained to my husband at 3 am in the morning that I was experiencing a lot of sharp pain. If that doesn't work,I have two thoughts. So, they may play the trick on you. I had trauma to the right side of my abdomen and hip area, have muscle spasms in the regular to this day, five years later, and my incision looks crazy. I mean you did what she asked, right??? Get this man an epidural. The heavy drinker, seemingly unaware of what is happening, become furious, resentful and enraged. E had a little trouble at first and I needed stitches, so DH stayed with us until 2am before he ran home to let our dogs out to go to the bathroom and he never did tell me if he needed to clean anything up while he was there! It concerned me, I spoke to him about it, and he stopped. My husband made the list! In labor with our second after my water broke at 6am. After 15 hours of back labor and a placental abruption, mine thought it would be cute to say, Honey, calm down! Karma soon gave him kidney stones afterwards. My husband and I heeded the advice and packed a bunch of snacks. He came home around 5 when my contractions were about 2 minutes apart and proceeded to watch tv and eat dinner. Children should be seen, and heard, and believed. If I was to go into labor when he was drinking he wouldn't be there and that's that. What would you do? With our third, he asked me to stretch out the pushing for 55 minutes so he would win the money pot at work. Thank goodness he was great the rest of the time or Id be a widow, not a divorcee. I find it pretty fvcked up that you are okay with him drinking a "few drinks every night" since someone else can drive you to give birth to yours and HIS own child. My husband ripped a huge, disgusting fart while I was in labor and then got offended when I gave him the dirtiest look I possibly could. Bringing an extra pair of pants or a sweater might keep you more comfortable for what could be a lengthy labor. It was 4am when I decided to wake up my husband (this was 2 hours after dealing with the labor on my own) and I told him its getting so much stronger now. Most nights he drinks to the point of stumbling, and not . Im so fed up that I almost want a divorce. With my first I called my then husband to tell him my water broke, he asked if I could drive myself to the hospital so he didnt have to leave work. The birth of our child is not about him, it's about me and the baby. Since I had to have a c-section he stayed in the hospital with me the 3 days sleeping on the couch and changed ALL the diapers. Our son was born in the morning. When my DH was starting up his business last year we were going through huge financial stress he would often have 2-3 beer over a day. Thats when the smell of a thousand beers hit me. So I went about my day normally and really thought something was going on around 3pm. I beleive that 4th pregnancy has got to be my last. However, this might not be a good decision, ever. Probably my biggest moment of suppressed anger started on the 2nd of December, 2006. After like 2 hours I called to have him tell me he didnt feel good so he was taking a nap, and that he was sure I could handle our daughter on my own. This was 1959, and husbands werent allowed in labor and delivery anyway. From what you've posted, your H has a serious problem. He slept it off too long, that should be the only issue, nit that he ate. If my DH drank that much regularly and refused to stop he would be on his own. This is the best Ive got: and my water broke at 2am so I tried calling him to tell him to come back. Its a disorder or an addiction that needs treatment than just taking the blame. I Just know I need someone calm and sober with me when labor starts, not someone with booze breath. Around 2am, I heard the scraping of a badly manoeuvred BBQ onto the deck and felt my husband flop down beside me into the bed. You notice a mucusy discharge or "bloody show". Was. -Amber, My husband made me wait for him to finish watching Gladiator after my water broke. Why do you women, not tell your foolish husbands long before you give birth, what you will not tolerate from him during your birth. One 2013 study, found that even . Allison Leonard/Ilona McCarty. There was a silence on the phone for a moment, and then in a quiet voice Grandma told Dad she was going to hang up and call back in 10 minutes, and at that time she expected a full report. I shoot him a look and he says oh, I thought you would drive. I was 7cm dilated when they checked me in. I have to admit, my husband is a trooper in regards to labor and delivery, absolutely wonderful. You probably will NEVER be in that much pain but if you are, I sincerely hope you remember what you said! He then drank some juice and couldnt hold my leg while I pushed because he was still a little shaky. My son is adopted but we were able to be at the birth. So the end result was his own personal police escort to the hospital. For instance, Mike made me wait in the lobby of our building while he went to get a . She had yummy ice chips and broth. There is absolutely a possibility she'll go into labor and need him. It's annoying, but it's not like he sits down and pounds hard alcohol or something. Prodromal labor can be as painful and uncomfortable as 'real' labor. Yes, keep telling her that labor will sober him right up, and that he has to sit in the waiting room if he is buzzed, because that's totally the right answer. Now for Baby #2I have pictures of Dad sitting in my hospital bed holding our daughter, chatting on a phone headset. If you want to read all 237 responses (and YOU DO), click here. I would be wasted if I had 5 drinks. You are not going to want to have this conversation, but you have to. So when my mom showed up to help out, hes so busy talking to her that Im having to hit him in the arm every time a contraction came so he would rub my back the only thing I asked him to do (hard back labor). If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married. Lydia and her husband Steven Reece, 40, from Winston . So this guy was supposed to NOT eat. Remember, youre not to be blamed for their habit. Then just before we were about to leave for the hospital, he looked at me and said, are you really going with your hair looking like that? . He never slept even when I did (due to pain meds, epidural didnt work) for 27 hours. Your scenario of DH's drinking hits so close to home for me. I was two weeks overdue, had been induced and then sent home because nothing was happening. And then figured hed take care of some business while he was on the line. Unless yo ass is imoan. There is no scientific proof to show that drinking alcohol can help in inducing labor. I feel so much resentment for his lack of physical and emotional support. If the birth of his child is not enough to deter him from drinking for a few weeks, then he has a serious problem. You should also try to increase your intake of healthy food and exercise regularly, as this will help you stay healthy both physically and mentally. Okay. While bringing the note over they saw his truck and had to go bang on our bedroom window to wake my stupid husband up. I thought he was bad, but now I see he was just average. said he was not paying for any unnecessary pain medication since he witnessed many cows giving birth and they just plop them out. Baby #1 I was told if my water broke it could be dangerous (I had too much) but i was reassured 80% of womens do not break. At the hospital he asked over and over If he could leave to go get himself dinner. Nesting. And never forgot it. LOL, you sound like my wifes ex. Lol! I dont remember anything I said or did after that. ! was my reply in the softest angry voice I could mutter. Soon enough he gets a call from his mother asking how the delivery is going. Finally he gets into town, horses and all in the hospital parking lot, smelling like a branding! Even if they "handle their liquor well" they are drunk at that point. You know, the stuff you still hold over his head. Ignore your husband's alcoholism and start getting used to doing things as a single parent. My husband decided the ideal time to invite his parents into the labor & delivery room was when I was laying spread eagle, everything out for the world to see, being stitched up by the doctor after our son was born. He would still have had alcohol in his system and in hindsight, a cab or ambulance would have been a better mode of transport. I had to be induced. Thanks! The one thing that you would do at this point is go into denial mode. Alcoholism is quite difficult to catch during the initial few meetings, but by the time you get to know about it, it is too late. Its a serious problem that can lead to social and physical problems. The husband is now a soon-to-be-ex-husband. but this isn't just within my relationships i'd say it's with friendships and working environment - REALLY envy those that have any guts to say what they feel. I guess I had it pretty good! When the guy on the other end asks so, how are you doing? because he probably heard my whimpering/low moaning in the background, my husband replies well my wife is actually in labor and were on the way to the hospital I think the guy on the phone call was speechless at first, and then smartly ended the conversation so my husband couldI dont know focus on driving through the blizzard and getting his wife to the hospital!?! Upon completion of said EP, he gave it to the neighbor. Heres the thing. So when I couldnt reach him for 40 min, I freaked out. Are you kidding me? OP is due very soon with her 4th child - her second with her husband - and he's rarely at home. He is lucky I didnt kill him. husband drunk when i went into labor. If we go anywhere and he has more than 2 drinks I drive home. fiizzlee = vag ** fiizzle = peen
Ask the medical staff questions. And spell it out that being there means being sober for the next few weeks, (and really after the baby comes). Thanks for the laughs though! Unbeknownst to her, it was contractions. Alcoholism is a serious addiction that can affect both the addict and those around them. My water had broken at 6pm while I was at work, they wouldnt allow me to drive home and the doc said it was too early to come in so I waited over an hour for my now ex husband to pick me up.
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